Here is a Haiku for all of my lovely readers:
Mrs. President
Where's your antiperspirant
Have you any, please?
I get paranoid--like, Richard Nixon paranoid--whenever I smell something...mmmm, that assaults the olfactory nerves. "Is it me?" I wonder, as I scoot away from other people and try to waft the air around me. After being disappointed with that experiment, I realize that I had not smelled this stench for the past 6.5hrs and only when a certain Mrs. President came in did the smell begin punching me in the nose like one of those "Knock your block off" toys. No, it couldn't be me! Me with my fresh scrubs, bleached and fabric-softened and ready to go for the work day. No, it had to be Mrs. President with her burlap sack-like clothing; but one mustn't judge. Nor must one stay within a 2 feet radius of Mrs. President. I imagine it is difficult for the doctors to examine her, but this is what they do. Actually, as my nose attempts to run into my head, the smell brings back a true story that I read about. The author was describing the odd things that women do to prevent pregnancies. One particular woman had a peculiar method for birth control. One day she went to the gynocologist and his senses were assaulted by the worst smell. This woman had in fact, used a potato as a prophylactic! How very odd (and smelly) indeed!
Well, I think that's all I shall write about on that subject! It's funny how many crazy things happened the past week or so when I did not have available internet, and now they seem small compared to the other daily happenings. I suppose I shall give key words to describe the past week:
Fuzzy navels; awkard ex-water beds; poop; guinea; golfcart; cow farmer; failed matchmaking; Step Brothers; skunk; Food Network; The Box; Mr. Darcy; Honey-sempai; wakeboarding; carpal tunnel...I believe that wraps it up!
Craziness awaits, be prepared!
- S
Where's your antiperspirant
Have you any, please?
I get paranoid--like, Richard Nixon paranoid--whenever I smell something...mmmm, that assaults the olfactory nerves. "Is it me?" I wonder, as I scoot away from other people and try to waft the air around me. After being disappointed with that experiment, I realize that I had not smelled this stench for the past 6.5hrs and only when a certain Mrs. President came in did the smell begin punching me in the nose like one of those "Knock your block off" toys. No, it couldn't be me! Me with my fresh scrubs, bleached and fabric-softened and ready to go for the work day. No, it had to be Mrs. President with her burlap sack-like clothing; but one mustn't judge. Nor must one stay within a 2 feet radius of Mrs. President. I imagine it is difficult for the doctors to examine her, but this is what they do. Actually, as my nose attempts to run into my head, the smell brings back a true story that I read about. The author was describing the odd things that women do to prevent pregnancies. One particular woman had a peculiar method for birth control. One day she went to the gynocologist and his senses were assaulted by the worst smell. This woman had in fact, used a potato as a prophylactic! How very odd (and smelly) indeed!
Well, I think that's all I shall write about on that subject! It's funny how many crazy things happened the past week or so when I did not have available internet, and now they seem small compared to the other daily happenings. I suppose I shall give key words to describe the past week:
Fuzzy navels; awkard ex-water beds; poop; guinea; golfcart; cow farmer; failed matchmaking; Step Brothers; skunk; Food Network; The Box; Mr. Darcy; Honey-sempai; wakeboarding; carpal tunnel...I believe that wraps it up!
Craziness awaits, be prepared!
- S
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